old friend.

hey live journal. it's been awhile. it's so weird how live journal was such an integral part of my life, now i had to really delve into the depths of memory to even remember the fucking password.

life, ironically, isn't that much different now than it was a few years ago. i'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. i still work at best buy. i still drink on a near every day basis. i still don't have a girlfriend. i still bitch and complain about the most pointless stuff. yeah, the only things that's really changed is my hair and my age.

valentine's day was on saturday, and this was probably the first valentine's day that i didn't spend wasted off vodka and listening to dashboard confessional on repeat. while i did have dumb trainings at work all day, i did manage to see ashley the night before. so TECHNICALLY i didn't spend valentine's day alone. i gave her the godiva chocolates she loves oh-so-much, and i swear, a smile never left my face. i'm not quite sure what it is about this girl, but she's kept my attention for more than a year already. i remember a while back i found an old moleskine i used to keep and i wrote down a few things the night after we initially met, it read:

"i finally met ashley at the falls on friday. goddamn, that girl is FUCKING CUTE. and sweet. cute and sweet. but who wants to bet that i fuck that up like always? i do."

nice to see that the glass is still always half-empty with me.


i'm glad i finally got over this dehydrated phase i was in. i must have drank my insides bone fucking dry last night. dollar beer night is one of those double bladed swords. it's so good, yet so so so horrible at the same time. i don't think i saw anyone who wasn't completely wasted last night. i did meet a girl named "gin" last night. funny story: so i'm standing sort of in between inside and the outside where the patio is and she was sitting with like three dudes at a table. well, she kept glancing up and looking up at me, and if i've learned anything in all of my years, it's i know when a girl is interested. so i walked back inside to the where my group of friends were standing, and sure enough she comes inside and walks over to me and mentions how her ex showed up and how she had to get out of there. we walk to another part of the bar and engage in some sort of conversation. i honestly don't even remember what the fuck we were talking about. i do remember at one point her telling me to get her phone number. i pull my phone out, and i was so wasted, it literally took me about five minutes to enter her number. touch screens and severe inebriation do not fucking mix well. we continued having some bullshit convo until some angry looking dude came inside and grabbed her and told her they were leaving. yeah, this guy definitely looked like he wanted to beat the shit out of me. oh well. i hope she was cute.

  • Current Music
    midtown - like a movie


so my face came in contact with the brick border of chez's pool, and yeah. ten stitches later. worst part is i'm not sure how it even happened. i climb out of the pool, look down and see blood all over my chest. wtf.

i think that was god's way of telling me that i definitely need to stay the fuck out of anything involving water. after that whole jellyfish ordeal that left me scarred for life, i really haven't bothered swimming. well, until today, and look what happened. scarred for life in a totally different way. next time i'm pretty sure i'm going to end up dead. no more water. ever again.

on the plus side, now i'll have a scar under my chin just like han solo! that and i have some vicodin. score.
  • Current Music
    cradle of filth - death comes ripping.

it's been awhile.

my live journal turned five on the first of the month. wow. five years. i remember when i first decided to join live journal. i was in yahoo chat hearing greg babble on about about how everyone had an lj and how i needed one. so he gave me an invite code (oh, invite codes, how i miss thee) and the rest is history. my first posts, wow. i was a senior in high school so you can guess what my entries were about. typical wah wah wah, girl doesn't like me, wah wah wah entries. in retrospect, i was an emotional wreck then. things haven't really changed THAT much in that aspect, but at least i'm not such a huge pussy anymore.

damn, i can't believe it's been five years. wow. five years and only 545 entries. i should really post more. if i'm looking back at all of this now and i'm freaked out, i wonder how amazed i'll be in ten years looking back...

okay, so in the last seven months that have passed, the more things have changed the more they've stayed the same. i don't work at circuit city anymore, no, i work for best buy now. and you know what? i like it. i like it. hands down the best job i've ever had. as much as retail sucks, it sucks in a way that isn't so painful. at circuit city, i was miserable twenty-five/eight. yeah, i was so miserable i had to create an extra hour and an extra day just to get by. every day was hell. here it's different. i mean, by no means is best buy a perfect walk in the park. i work at a store in a pretty really bad location (south park mall :( ), but as far as pay and benefits and respect and all of that goes, i can't complain. i don't forsee myself making a career out of it, but for the time being, i'm pretty content.

i tried going back to school. that failed miserably. school and i go together about as well as whitney houston and bobby brown. "higher education" just doesn't do it for me. i don't know how people can slave their lives away at school just for a fucking job. ugh, whatever, i don't want to get into this. moral of the paragraph: fuck school, and fuck you,too.

music's been going pretty decent. we made a cd and passed them around, and we've been getting sort of "known". we've had a lot of good shows that have opened doors for us. our guitarist, adrian, found out not too long ago that a girl he used to date just got hired as an A&R rep for a record label. talk about luck. hopefully she can pull a few strings, so we can take this to the next level.

girls. man, i still hate girls. god, i meet the most fucked up members of the opposite sex. the girls i meet always lead these fucked up lives, involving ex-boyfriends and husbands, and they all seem to have fucking kids. not babies. FUCKING KIDS.

myspace is still myspace. my hair is still long. hella is still fucking awful. and this diet dr. pepper doesn't really taste that much like regular dr. pepper. that shows you right there what a degree does for you.
  • Current Music
    queens of the stone age.

hella is the worst band ever.

I've finally realized why life has been sucking so much lately. No, it's not because I don't work at gay ass Circuit City anymore (greatest thing to happen to me all year). It's not because I don't have a girlfriend. Nor is it because alcohol is still my only friend. It's not because George W. Bush is still our president, please, remember this: Yeah, exactly. No, the real reason life has been sucking is because:

this girl:

has been M.I.A for the last five months.

Dear Sarah,

I miss you like the desert misses rain. If you're reading this, come back, and make everything right again.

  • Current Music
    aces highhhhhhhhh.